I’ve been married 19 years to a pretty wonderful woman. But if we don’t stop this movement toward same-sex marriages, I may be forced to leave her. That’s right. In a story about the burgeoning movement, the president of the Family Research Council said, “We cannot permit a few states and cities to force same-sex marriages on the rest of America.”
I love you, babe. It’s been great, but these judges and cities and states are making me do it. We could probably use a toaster for a wedding present, and I don’t have any high heeled shoes.